Wednesday Musings

Hurts

Doesn’t feel like people want me, to live. Not really feeling loved, or wanted in this world. That kind of hate; wears a person down. It will eat you alive. You would think; that kind of hate; would leave them hurting? Maybe, they don’t know; or understand it? Maybe. . .

Waiting for my death. Not a friend in the world. The way things are; no one calls, or comes to visit. And, maybe that is best. Because let’s be honest; they likely don’t have much on their minds; other than what they hear on the tv. The way things are; small talk; is a bore.

Looking for 15% of the population. Did the math on it; and it looks like it works out; to be 51 million people. Would like to find them, and promote them. We should all be living a lot better. The way things are; they may be the only real people in this whole world. I’m not sure, about this; it is however, what i’ve thought about. I’m really not sure yet.

Wants

Want some love in my life. Tired of feeling hated. It is tearing me up. I’m not able to function, feeling like this. I’m wasting away; and waiting for my death. Want better. Want a lot better. Seems, the way things are. Not able to change this stuff, not to save my life. Would really like to change it, for the better.

Much, is uncertain right now. No one to talk with about this stuff. Wish i had some good answers, to my problems; and questions. Feeling like, the way things are. Want to have some fun again. This life, feels like a living death to me. Just total zombie shit. Want better.

Tired

Life is wearing on me. Seems, i’ve got my heart on my sleeve. That may not be a wise choice. I’m feel very lonely. People, make me feel lonely. It doesn’t seem, that they understand me. And, we aren’t communicating well. That is the first sign, of real problems. Want to fix it.

Want peace with them. The way things are; i feel more hated, than ever before. Feeling like, the way things are. They don’t give a damn. That hurts.

No one to talk with about anything. feeling like, total crap. Tired of hurting like i do. Tired of being alone like i am. Neither is good. Not able to change this stuff. No one listened, or cared. Damn it.

Want this to end. Looking for the system, to reset itself; or loop over. And, the system had better loop over, until the system resets itself. That much, I am counting on. Want good results with this. The way things are; not sure, much can be done about it. No one to talk with about this stuff. Need this stuff, to work out for me.

I’m not happy. The way i’m being treated, has left me, hurting. It has actually left me with a nasty death wish. And, I’m not sure, how to fix it; when the treatment i’m being shown; won’t stop happening to me.

Feeling like, they want puppets. They want to pull all the strings, and watch me dance their jig, to what ever tune, they feel like. Want to be treated better than that. Don’t want to be anyone’s puppet. Feeling like, they have shown me, some real bad lessons.

Looking For Peace

Looking in this life; for some real peace. Wish people would show some love, and kindness to me. The neglect; is tough to deal with. Maybe some of it; is for the best? Who can really say for sure? What I do know; there are some doubts, about the people in this world. Would like to clear the matters up; and know for certain. Not knowing, is difficult. I can only guess about it. And, my guess; could be wrong. So, I need to know.

Looking for someone that loves me. Want some comfort, that feels like comfort. Tired of hurting like i do. The way things are, no one will spend time with me. Ouch!!!! Do they know, they are hurting me? I wonder. . .